Today we all already know that Mr. Darcy was not arrogant or proud, he was an introvert whose extrovert friends dragged him to a party where he didn’t know anyone.
When he says “there is no one here beautiful enough to tempt me to dance”, he does not mean that you are not beautiful enough, Lizzie Bennett, he means that *he* cannot dance, in other words: there is not enough alcohol in the world.
Miraculously, when you meet him at his house or at events that include up to four people, three of whom he has known for years, he is the nicest in the room.
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Signs that you are (maybe) a sociable introvert
(published in my column in Lasha)
Mandy Patinkin and Katherine Grody, my favorite couple on Instagram, occasionally get into an argument about the topic of silence: Mandy likes silence on shared trips, and Katherine, at least Mandy claims, prefers to talk or read something to him that she just read. This debate will often lead to a discussion of Mandy himself being a quiet person, yes or no. Patinkin, a charismatic actor, defines himself – to the surprise of his family – as a quiet person. More than that, he defines himself as an introvert: “a quiet and shy introvert, except when I perform.” The introvert spectrum rises again and again and now it seems that it is impossible to define another person according to our experience of him as an introvert or an extrovert or an ambivert (both, it depends) and we have no choice but to wait for that person to define himself. On the introvert dear website, they mention that even Carl Jung, the father of the concept, explained in advance that there is no such thing as a person who is only an introvert or only an extrovert. So: very pleasant, I’m an extroverted introvert. I mean introverted, but the sociable type. Yes, that’s right, a new definition appeared on the table along the way. Who is the sociable introvert and are you one too? If you have an inner feeling that you are an introvert, you prefer to be at home, but you don’t have social anxiety, you are able to start or continue a conversation with strangers easily and there will also be those who think that you were the nail of the evening – you are probably a social introvert. If you want to define yourself, of course.
Signs that you belong to this tribe:
1. The environment affects your energy levels. Is the waiting hall crowded and ugly? you feel it Is the music loud? you get tired You are one of those people who will switch dentists because “his clinic is depressing” and you might even burst into tears because the Airbnb apartment you booked has ugly bedding (based on a real case). And vice versa: when you are in a beautiful and cozy room you relax and music you like will fill you with energy.
2. You love people, but not every day please. No matter how much fun you have with your girlfriends, you need a few hours afterwards to recharge.
3. Maybe I exaggerated with the “people lover”. There are people who fill you with energy and there are energy guzzlers that you feel you have to limit their presence in your life for health reasons.
4. You like to be alone, but not for too long. After a few days like this, you already have to meet people (and then recover from them, and God forbid).
5. You have no patience for mingling. A hall full of strangers doesn’t make you want to rush in and make sure you’re remembered.
6. You are happy to talk about topics that interest you, But finds it difficult to bear the burden of small talk.
7. You don’t immediately answer messages and emails. What to do, if the email caught you in a non-communicative mood, the other party will have to wait patiently.
8. And of course you don’t answer the phones.
9. you are misleading Most of what is said here is true about you, and most people will still be mistaken for thinking that you are an extrovert.
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Matthew McFadden, Mr. Darcy of 2005 and Tom Wombsgens of Heirs, reminds me that on 3/26 comes the fourth season.