“We want to ride a bike”. Sveva, six, wrote it. In a note that he delivered to his parents at the beginning of the umpteenth week in the red zone in Lombardy, with the closure of all schools and the transfer of distance learning. Not that he can’t ride the yard with his brothers. But for Sveva, Nicolò and Giacomo, riding a bike means taking long rides, visiting friends and grandmother or having a picnic. It means to live.
The three brothers are students of the De Amicis school in Pavia, they attend the first, the second and the fifth and live this moment in dad at the same time. “We consider ourselves lucky, we have equipped three small rooms with computers and tablets for them in my husband’s study” says Carlotta, the mother. But they can’t leave them alone. Sveva, who does the second, often touches the computer risking to blow up setting and connection; Giacomo, 6 years old, has a hard time maintaining concentration and learning to write through a screen.
“They experience this confinement as a spite that we adults are doing to them: they are angry because they see that we go to work or to the supermarket while they cannot go to the park or to friends’ houses. They have a hard time understanding why these restrictions apply only to them”, says the mother.
The voices of children
Almost 7 million children are not going to school due to the Coronavirus emergency, 4 out of 5. Closed at home and engaged in distance learning. “Children have become invisible. Even before the Covid emergency, they had literally disappeared from the collective imagination”, from streets, squares, courtyards, writes Daniele Novara with concern in “Children are always the last” (Bur).
How are they experiencing this moment? “I like going to school”, says Alessandro, fourth grade. On the other hand, a friend of his defends distance learning because, he says, “he doesn’t have to wear a mask all day”.
Above all there is a lack of companions. Marta is in first grade and I really want to learn. “It is difficult to be in dad with schoolmates and teachers. But in a while, thank goodness, we will go back to school, and we will be able to hug each other as we always do even if we can’t”. Also thanks to the teachers, the mothers commented in chat at the end of a day in distance learning: “My daughter was distracted and was very tired at the end but certainly the teachers could not do more”.
Filippo, 5 years old, however, does not live this condition serenely: “I would like to stay at school and play with my friends”, he says.
Sofia makes a very precise analysis of the situation: “I don’t like Dad because usually, before entering the classroom, my friends would talk or joke and when we went out we would run up the stairs and have an ice cream. Instead now I have to turn off the microphone. and the camera. In the breaks between lessons I start reading but it’s not the same thing “.
For Sofia, who reads, there are many slightly older children who use empty times not to rest their eyes but to watch videos or films. Or that they turn off the camera and microphone during the lesson: “So the teacher doesn’t know what I’m doing,” says Leo.
Alexander’s birthday party with connected companions
The dad for younger children
The dad serves not to interrupt teaching in the presence of particularly restrictive measures to stem the contagion. But is it suitable for such young students? “No. Children learn because they are placed in a context in which they can also move and interact, actively do things, move around. Just think of Maria Montessori’s teachings. In the classroom the teacher moves between the desks and gives directions to everyone. , organizes group work, the children interact with each other and exchange ideas, information, jokes. Still, working on a common project creates motivation and participation. This integrative context of experiences is not there in front of a flat screen “, explains Anna Oliveiro Ferraris, psychologist and psychotherapist, former professor of Developmental Psychology at La Sapienza University.
The consequences in the present
A first consequence concerns sight. “The eye in developmental age must exercise, that is, look far and at various distances, not only near and at a fixed distance for a long time, the risk is myopia”, explains the psychologist. “There are also other physical consequences related to posture, such as neck and back pain, headache, dizziness and sometimes nausea so it is good to take breaks and stretch exercises.”
And on a psychological level? “Dad isolates at an age in which one learns to socialize and be with others. They are informal but important learning. It is true that there can also be a little socialization in Dad if before or after the lessons the children are left free to interact, but it is still limited socialization, on a flat screen “.
Without forgetting that in Italy about 45% of children are only children and for them the interaction with other children takes place outside the home, at school, in parks, in places where sports, motor or other activities are done together. kind.
The long-term consequences
The prolonged experience of distance learning, associated with a situation of family confinement at home like the one we are experiencing, could also have long-term consequences. “There will be differences from case to case, from family to family. However, it is good to keep in mind that in developmental age there are phases in which children are more sensitive to certain stimuli and learning than in others, skipping those phases can give rise to delays that then require a recovery. Children, like adults, are also habitual and if they remain confined to the house for too long they can refuse to go out even when it is possible “.
What parents can do
There are many little big steps that parents can take to help their children. How to make sure that during breaks and after online lessons they take their eyes off the monitor; be reachable during lessons; reassure them by explaining that this is temporary and that the school will be back in attendance.
“It is also necessary to avoid transmitting anxiety, fear and insecurity. From an emotional point of view, children resonate with their parents, therefore striving to transmit trust and not be too controlling and obsessive. Then involve them in home activities and also get them out every whenever possible: park, beach. Encourage movement activities and all the achievements that they can do with their hands. Play is fundamental for their psychophysical well-being, both those of movement and those of imagination where they can enter a fun and not anxious dimension. Since they already spend a lot of time on the computer it is good to reduce video games or abolish them altogether. The good night story told by dad, mom or other adult is beneficial “, suggests psychologist and psychotherapist Anna Oliveiro Ferrais.
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