Warning. The language of this column is direct and explicit.
I am a cisgender heterosexual male who loves prostate self-stimulation. I discovered it in old age, but for fifteen years it has become a pillar of my life. I am worried that I am pushing the limits of this too far and I would like your opinion. Recently, let’s say the last six months, I have orgasms so intense that I feel pain, right after, to the right of the base of my penis and balls. If I push a finger towards the center of my body, I feel pain. The feeling goes away after a few minutes but sometimes my right ball is sore. I’ve even taken ibuprofen to relieve pain, have a prostate exam when it happens, and do testicular self-tests, but haven’t noticed any changes. My next orgasm is usually normal, and there are no particular pains or sensitivities. As I said, however, this happens after intense sessions with a lot of prostate stimulation. Even though I have been doing this kind of anal activity for some time, it seems to me that I have only perfected them in the last few years. I must also say that my sessions last up to two hours, and that I stay erect most of the time. Of course I don’t want to hurt myself, and I don’t think it’s happening, but I’m worried. It’s very hard to stop doing something that makes me feel so incredibly good. I’m a little uncomfortable talking to my urologist, because he treats me like I’m an old uncle he rarely sees. On our first visit, I made it very clear to him that my dad had prostate cancer and that I really wanted him to take the time to take exams and make sure I didn’t have any problems. I also told him that the last exam prescribed by my doctor did not last long enough to seem accurate and I encouraged the urologist to take his time there. He did not. Hope you can help me.
–Pain Around Balls Concerning
“I’ve never had a patient tell me specifically that they want me to ‘take the time’ for a prostate exam,” says Dr. Ashley Winter, a registered urologist in Portland, Oregon. “But on numerous occasions I have had patients who said to me ‘wow, it was a much more detailed prostate exam than my GP did.’ And generally that comment counts as a ‘thank you’; as if to say ‘thank you for scrupulousness’ “.
To be completely honest, PABC, I shared your letter with Dr. Winter because I figured that your request – take your time over there, Doctor – might be the reason that prompted your doctor to take a hasty exam. Winter assured me that this is an unlikely hypothesis.
“I understand how many want a doctor to do a thorough examination,” he told me. “A detailed examination shows that the physician is indeed interested in gathering patient information that goes beyond laboratory tests and radiological examinations. The patient feels ‘observed’. Or touched. In short, we understood each other “.
But just as a prostate exam that ends early isn’t proof that a doctor thinks a patient is a pervert, an exam that ends quickly doesn’t mean a doctor isn’t scrupulous.
“Some patients have a ‘very hidden prostate’, for example, and it’s hard to feel anything except the vertex, or tip,” says Winter. “And my fingers are long! In those cases, I will probably practice a short in-out because lengthening the time would simply force me to massage the anus without being able to collect specific information “.
There’s nothing wrong with massaging your anus just for the fun of it, of course, but you don’t need to go to medical school or see a doctor to do it. But while I was on the phone with her, I asked Dr Winter again if some people go to the doctor with just that idea in mind.
“In some extremely rare cases, patients are manipulative or fetishize their exams, but that’s extremely rare,” he replied. “And while I can’t rule out the possibility that the urologist PABC consulted was ‘baffled’ by his comments, it seems more likely that PABC is doing screenings on his doctor. There is a lot of shame about that kind of ‘anal activity’ among patients, and so I understand why this happens. ” raised the question).
That said, while there are few perverts who visit for pleasure, some people get aroused during exams.
“Involuntary genital responses – whether it’s erections or secretions from the prostate during a rectal exam – are normal and sometimes happen,” Winter told me. “It is the job of any doctor who is respectful and in a healthy relationship with sex to recognize that these things are normal and move on. But it is a very rare fact and when it happens the patient is usually stressed and apologizes insistently for it “. As for your problem – soreness around the base of the penis after one of your long masturbation sessions with anal activity – Winter thinks you need a different type of exam.
“His problem appears to be spasms in his pelvic floor muscles,” he told me. “People tense and contract the muscles of the pelvis – the muscles at the base of the penis – during periods of prolonged stimulation. He’s not doing anything wrong and he mustn’t stop doing it. But maybe he might want to take a hot bath afterward. And if it bothers him or gets worse, he should have a pelvic floor exam and possibly pelvic floor physiotherapy prescribed. ”
There is a longstanding controversy in the adult baby-diaper lover (abdl) community over the long-term effects for adults who like to constantly wear and use baby diapers. Some argue that adults may begin to urinate in bed or become incontinent due to continual use of diapers. Abdl adepts who claim to have “forgotten to use the potty” are vigorously denounced as liars by others in their community. Of course, there are not many medical studies on this subject (indeed, there are none at all), and I will ask my family doctor. Can you understand something?
–In Nappies Cancels Out Nocturia
Absolutely not.
***
I am a 74 year old straight male. I don’t have a problem with you. In fact, I am writing to share an idea with you that could be beneficial to all of society. But unlike you, I don’t have the means to spread the news. Thanks to the success of your It gets better project, you seem like the ideal person to go public. My idea and my proposal for you is the following: an international coming out day, during which you could reveal your sexual orientation but not only. There would also be room for long-hidden “secrets”, such as infidelity, crushes, being no longer in love with one’s spouse, or whatever a person may have kept hidden. I even have a suggestion on when to celebrate International Coming Out Day: March 4th. The slogan would be March forth on march fourth !. What do you think about it?
– Movement About Really Changing Hearts
There is already a National Coming Out Day (NCOD), MARCH, in which undeclared queer people everywhere are encouraged – if they can safely do so – to reveal themselves to family, friends, neighbors, and colleagues. Coming out day is nothing new and has taken place every October 11th since 1988. And while I appreciate the spirit of your proposal – let’s spit out all those old secrets we keep inside – I’m not sure you’ve thought through it. the consequences of the thing.
If one day we spit out our secrets – including extramarital affairs, crushes and secret second families – the result would be more like the day of coming out than The Judgment Night. And since for most people ending a romance or parting at the holidays is unnecessary and avoidable cruelty, those who confess their escapades, or are no longer in love, on an international coming out day, would not be considered. like brave voices of truth, MARCH, but like tactless bitches. It’s okay to dump someone: people stop loving each other, or they have flings. But no one thinks it’s acceptable to dump someone – or share a secret that forces a person to dump you – on Thanksgiving, Christmas, or Valentine’s Day. Because then the person whose heart you broke ends up remembering it every year when that holiday inevitably returns. And so since it’s not fair to spit out terrible secrets on holidays that already exist, it wouldn’t be fair to spit them out on a day devoted to spitting out terrible secrets.
(Translation by Federico Ferrone)