Dr. Ranko Rajović revealed to RTS Ordinacija how he limited his child’s video games.
Dr. Ranko Rajević, specialist in internal medicine, master’s degree in neurophysiology and doctor of sports science, spoke about the importance of setting boundaries for children. We recently received the best advice on parenting from Dr. Rajović. He talked about how he brings up his children a few years ago in the RTS Ordinacija show.
My son Danilo got a video game for his 5th birthday, and since I’m not really into that, I asked the cousin who bought it – why?
She tells me: “Well, Ranko, don’t be primitive, everyone has it, how is he going to play with other children if he doesn’t know anything about it? Well, you see where the logic is, when he plays that game alone.”” The doctor says that he decided to let his son play for half an hour a day, but it soon started to get out of control.
I tried to explain to him that he won’t have good eye accommodation, that he will have attention problems when he starts school, that he won’t be able to read for more than 15 minutes and that it’s called dyslexia, he let me finish and asked: ‘Is can I play now?’. I see that it is not worth it.
Okay, I say, since you cheated on me a couple of times, I’m going to take this from you until we can make a deal. ‘Dad, come back, we’ll make a deal.’ Then I ask him:
‘Okay, you want to play this once or twice a week?’
‘No, I want to every day.’
‘Once or twice a week? If we don’t agree, I’ll take it from you. You have 10 seconds. 10, 9, 8…’
Then we agreed, according to the same principle, that it would be half an hour, Monday and Thursday. We signed the contract, which I photographed.
Already tomorrow he cheated. I took the phone from him, he was crying all kinds of crying. The next time he cheated, he cried for an hour. He didn’t even cry the third time. He understood that there is a limit and that once he crosses it, there is no going back. That’s the wisdom of parenting, setting boundaries. “Parents need to educate themselves, to read, to see what’s new in order to learn to position themselves in the right way,” asserts Dr. Rajović.
It is not a problem for a child to look at a screen for half an hour and then go outside for half an hour or an hour to run around to somehow make up for it. The problem is if there is no movement, but everything boils down to looking at the screen, is the main message that the doctor wants to send to parents.
When asked when it is okay to give a child a device, Dr. Rajović says that he would never give children phones before school, even though he knows it is impossible.
A child has boredom as a development factor. When he is bored, he has to think, to invent, to use toys for fun. When you turn on the cartoon, it doesn’t have to do anything, the problem of boredom is solved. The child likes it, wants to solve all problems like that, right now. Just like a cartoon solves the problem of boredom right now.”
Speaking further about the importance of movement in children, he adds that the most important subjects up to the age of 12 are physical education, music and art. The main activity is movement, and the brain develops in movement, so it is the child’s job to move. If a child cannot move backwards, he will not understand math in minus tomorrow. Children should be on the move from morning to night. This allows them to develop. Park, playgrounds. The more difficult we make their movements, the better they develop. Walking on the curb, painting, that’s what they need.
“I am aware that he cannot do physical education every day at school, but there are ways to provide children with quality development in regular classes as well. For example, some teachers I work with took lastish, connected benches with it, where children pass and Then, when the child goes to the board, he passes there, jumping over the obstacles, and goes back in reverse. The goal is to keep the bell from ringing. That’s how you can compensate for that lack of movement.”
“Uroš Petrović came up with a riddle at a workshop: What is the relationship between albatross and the number 40? No one knows, but guesswork begins:
Wingspan, is it 40 dm? – Excellent observation, but it is not, but 35.
How many years does he live? – Oh, you’re thinking right, he lives by the sea, eats healthy and lives a long time. Even 80 years.
Does it lay on eggs for so many days? – Great idea, and because it is a big bird, it lays for a long time, 60 days. The hen is smaller, she lays for 21 days, and the albatross for 60.
That’s how you learn. Every time they give an answer, I encourage them to think carefully, but then when they realize that the answer is not correct, they feel that excitement like when you open a gift and you don’t know what’s inside, so you can’t wait to find out. Children remember the information obtained in this way, this is how they learn. He is not given information on a tray like in school. The path to knowledge is important.
When I later asked them what their wingspan was, how long the albatross lays on its eggs, they all answered in unison. Otherwise, the albatross can fly 40 kilometers per hour.”
Everything the child says, every answer he gives, should be encouraged. When he answers incorrectly, you don’t even have to say that it’s incorrect, it’s enough to roll your eyes, to discourage the child. A child should be taught to think, claims Dr. Rajović.
When parents have small children, they buy socket protectors. What did you teach the child? Well, he will go to his grandparents, to his aunt, there will be no protection there. The child should be taught the cause-and-effect relationship immediately. If he starts pushing his fingers, it’s better to burn his fingers right away, so that he understands that if he touches the socket, it will be unpleasant,” advises this child development expert.
Speaking about what occupations we are preparing children for today, Dr. Rajović reminds that, of the 10 occupations that are most in demand today, nine of them did not exist 10 years ago. This means that today we are preparing children for occupations that do not yet exist!
“What does that tell you? That our first goal should be to teach children to think.”