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My postpartum: 5 trying realities ~ The chronicles of a young mother

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My postpartum: 5 trying realities ~ The chronicles of a young mother

At least 40 million women are likely to suffer a long-term health problem caused by childbirth according to an article published in The Lancet Global Health. Among these health problems, 11 to 17% of women suffer from postpartum depression.

Illana Weizman launches the hashtag #MonPostPartum on the social network Instagram. In 24 hoursmore than 10,000 other women talk about their experiences in the weeks after giving birth. #MonPostPartum is a hashtag to encourage mothers to no longer keep quiet about their postpartum realities.

Today I join this community. I decide to share with you the least pleasant part of my postpartum: 5 trying realities experienced personally.

Speaking out is liberating and healing

I remember that I had all the cards in hand to live my life well post-partum. I spent my entire pregnancy reading articles and follow shows on the subject. I think it wasn’t enough because I failed to adapt what I learned with my reality. Plus, I put a lot of pressure on myself at first because I really wanted to be the perfect mom.

senivpetro via Freepik

Back from the clinic, after two difficult months, I decided to seek help because I was sinking into a deep depression. Speaking out is liberating and healing. Here is the therapy I recommend for a start. Express yourself to feel lighter.

» Let’s free the floor on motherhood “ , this is indeed the slogan of the CJM. A community of young mothers created almost three years ago. Building this community in search of answers was my contribution to breaking the taboos around postpartum.

5 painful realities experienced during my postpartum

The search for my new identity

I really didn’t realize I had become a mother until I had my daughter in my arms. From that moment on, we had to take care of her above all.

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NGPhotos via Iwaria

I very quickly found myself juggling my roles as a new mother, a partner, and a full-fledged individual. I continually asked myself: how do I find a balance between these different identities? This question gave rise to other reflections on my experience. The lack of answers led to fear and emotional instability.

Don’t try to escape this postpartum stage. In my opinion, it is even important for rediscovering yourself and redefining your priorities.

Relationship challenges: alone in my bubble

Back from the clinic, the routine sets in very quickly and every day is the same. I admit that the days were the same and the nights very long, one more than the other.

andreas via Freepik

So much so that the more time passed, the more I became a homebody and I lost all desire to open up to others. Postpartum is a real time of solitude, because beyond the moments of joy, you feel alone and misunderstood. This feeling persists especially when you operate in a context where you cannot necessarily express yourself with complete peace of mind.

The difficulties of breastfeeding

Breastfeeding was the most painful reality for me. I practiced exclusive breastfeeding for only three weeks and then I introduced artificial milk because the milk supply was not at all good despite all the recipes. I felt a lot of guilt and blamed myself for not being able to give the best to my baby. The most painful thing in this story is receiving reproaches rather than support from loved ones.

Your mother breastfed you until you were two years old; so, no reason why you shouldn’t do the same thing. You are not doing your best to produce enough milk to feed baby. You know that breast milk is the best food, so why don’t you want to feed him within?

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So many derogatory comments that lead mothers to doubt their ability to be good mothers for their children.

Also read: Breastfeeding: 5 trying realities

The emotional and mental burden

Postpartum is a difficult time for new mothers because they are looking for balance and bearings as an individual, a new mother, a partner and later, a professional. The search for a new identity, relational challenges, breastfeeding difficulties or even caring for babies are all parameters that can affect the mother’s mental health and cause postpartum depression.

A new mother needs to be encouraged, motivated and above all supported during the postpartum period. She needs a lot of patience and kindness for her mental and physical well-being.

Sociocultural pressure

We are in a society that has long idealized pregnancy and the role of women once they become mothers. The illusion that the perfect mom exists does far more harm than good. It creates a lot of social and cultural pressure that mothers experience on a daily basis while being ready to beat themselves up for the slightest mistake. No one is born a mother with all the skills it takes to care for a child. It’s a constant learning process that requires a lot of patience and investment. This idea of ​​being perfect, of saying Yes I knowwhen in reality, no, I don’t know anythingpushes mothers to get lost and no longer be able to fully enjoy this enriching experience.

Relational challenges, breastfeeding, pressure from society or even the search for one’s bearings are all experiences that have impacted me, both positively and negatively and which have made me the mother that I am. currently.

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So, have you experienced other painful realities? If so, I will be happy to discover them in the comments.

Read also: Becoming a mother: what I wish I knew to approach parenthood

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