Susanne is mendacity immobile on her again, immobile. He receives meals by means of a tube in his nostril. You have a catheter. His eyes are very swollen and his eyelids don’t shut.
Susanne Schlößer’s mom wrote this in her diary after visiting the hospital. His daughter is in a coma in a clinic in Nuremberg. You have TBE, which might be attributable to a tick chew. The diary entries are from 2017.
Today Susanne Schlößer is 63 years outdated. Apart from the thick lenses of his glasses, there isn’t any signal of sickness. But the tick virus took its toll on his mind – with results Schlößer nonetheless feels as we speak. In an interview with FOCUS on-line, he seems again and divulges how he fought his method out of a deep gap – bodily and mentally.
FOCUS web: It all began for them in 2017, most likely with a tick chew, which they didn’t discover. What was that point in your life?
Susanne Schloesser: I used to be working my method up. I used to be employed on the college on a salary-based contract and I used to be very proud. I acquired more cash this yr than in earlier years. In the center of the highest, I acquired actually sick. I instantly had flu-like signs: headache, nausea, weak spot. I finished consuming and ingesting. This went on for a number of days. As a self-employed particular person, there was no sick observe for me, I believed it might be effective. However, these round me have been shocked. My household known as my ex-husband who’s a health care provider. He despatched me straight to the clinic. I did not notice that I used to be taken to the hospital.
Do that solely within the information?
Castles: Yes, I did not reply anymore, I did not see something, I used to be simply sleeping. Viruses had already blocked my thoughts. I would not be capable to make different selections both. My son carried me to the automotive.
That was on the finish of July 2017. What have been you instructed later about your first time within the hospital?
Castles: I wasn’t in a coma, however my thoughts was closed. At first we did not know what was the trigger. Finally, a lumbar puncture was carried out in neurology and a tick was discovered. You cannot really do something in opposition to a virus like this, you may solely restrict the results. Then I went to the following clinic. It grew to become clear that my situation was not life-threatening, however would final till I used to be higher.
What is your first reminiscence of being within the hospital?
Castles: I’ve no reminiscence of the primary month. My first acutely aware reminiscence: I believed the wallpaper was coloured, I noticed coloration all over the place. I believed the nurses have been Russian troopers. There was a nurse who appeared to talk Russian. I’ve thought-about that in desires. Moreover, my eyelids didn’t open, I couldn’t see something. At that point I grew to become utterly absorbed in listening and dreaming and had an unbelievable concern. My household needed to always reassure me that every thing was effective.
How lengthy have you ever been on the clinic?
Castles: Three months. I feel I all the time had guests, there was all the time somebody there. My sister got here to Nuremberg from Munich twice per week. He first mentioned that my mom didn’t come as a result of she didn’t wish to see me like that. He later cried bitterly after his first go to. I seemed unhealthy. When my buddies got here and noticed me like that, all of them acquired vaccinated after that.
Have you ever thought concerning the TBE vaccine?
Castles: No. I believed, I reside within the metropolis, I can see a tick and take away it. But for me I did not see any ticks in any respect. In addition, my virus shouldn’t be really from this area. My onerous type could be very uncommon. Vaccination would have made my restoration simpler.
How did you deal emotionally with the truth that you have been affected by a uncommon, very extreme type of TBE?
Castles: At first, within the clinic, I used to be so frightened about survival that I did not hassle with different ideas. First, I did every thing I may to get again on my toes and used every kind of occupational remedy, speech remedy and physiotherapy. The assaults of despair got here later. I cried rather a lot after the clinic. I used to be in a wheelchair, nonetheless blind. A physician as soon as mentioned: ‘If you possibly can flip tears into energy, rather a lot would have been achieved.’
Back to your time on the clinic: What did the primary steps appear to be?
Castles: I’ve had each remedy conceivable. I needed to learn every thing once more. My thoughts shut down all bodily features. I could not open my lips, I could not swallow, I could not eat. My total jaw was locked and I could not even put a straw in. I used to be fed by means of a nasal tube and peed by means of a cannula. So I acquired meals remedy. Then my eyelashes have been taped so they would not fall down. This was additionally a type of remedy. It took a whole lot of dripping and rubbing as quickly as my eyes have been open to have the ability to tolerate it in any respect.
How did you handle to remain motivated despite the fact that progress was taking small steps?
Castles: You have to appreciate that small steps are profitable. And an important psychological measure while you really feel unhealthy is attachment. I communicated with everybody, I knew all of the therapists by identify, I joked with all of the nurses. This bond made me really feel alive.
In what situation was he launched after three months?
Castles: I used to be sitting in a wheelchair. We have rebuilt our home – a three-storey mid-terrace home – small with rails and ramps. I then slowly acquired prepared from the mattress and headed for the lavatory with a walker. But I could not stand for lengthy. I all the time needed to have somebody with me. My two sons and my husband have been there, my mom got here each week together with my brother from Hamburg and my uncle to take care of me and prepare dinner for me.
How did you’re feeling at the moment that you simply nonetheless rely upon others?
Castles: Yes, I struggled rather a lot with it and I nonetheless battle to this present day after I cannot do issues. Because I’ve all the time been an lively and lively particular person. But principally I used to be extremely grateful for my prolonged household. And there was all the time little progress, it saved shifting ahead. After a yr of being sick, I went to rehab once more. For a walker, most physiotherapy is all the time with out a walker. I believed, I’ll work onerous now and have my outdated life once more. But I needed to notice that despite the fact that issues have been getting higher, they have been by no means going to be excellent once more. If I pushed myself too onerous, my physique would put me in a impartial state so all I may do was sleep or lie down. I’ve to regulate my vitality despite the fact that I wish to achieve this a lot.
What is the final feeling of success that you simply keep in mind?
Castles: Last yr I used to be on vacation with buddies at Lake Garda. We walked above Lake Garda, over hill and dale for an hour, then took a break at a restaurant and had to return for one more hour. A buddy mentioned: ‘Susanne, you might be doing this for the primary time. That’s actually superb.’ That was six years after the sickness. It was a protracted method to get there.
Do you generally miss the outdated model of you or discover peace?
Castles: In psychology they are saying: Comparison kills. As lengthy as I examine myself to the way in which I used to be, I can all the time write a listing of issues I can now not do. This is irritating. In psychosomatic rehab I realized to work on different issues and to be grateful. The a part of my mind chargeable for steadiness was severely affected by the virus. I additionally undergo from neurological strabismus and my eyes tire rapidly. So I am unable to drive a automotive or a motorbike. I can now not play the piano or faucet dance, which I used to take pleasure in. But that is why I sing and paint. I am unable to learn lengthy books, however I simply hearken to audio books and German radio so I do know politics very properly.
You attempt to give attention to the optimistic elements. Would you share this recommendation with different victims?
Castles: Yes positively. And I realized that communication is an important factor in my life: to take pleasure in being with individuals. I am going out to the market, discuss to everybody, joke all over the place. Attachment is among the most essential survival instruments. I might advocate this to everybody. The worst factor is to remain at residence and be offended. Get out, reside as a lot as you may, that helps!