Foster carers need a few things to ensure that they can show up and do what they need to do. A major consideration here is always going to be personal well-being. If a carer is not feeling happy, supported, or connected with what they are trying to do, then the role will quickly fall apart. This is not a situation that anyone wants to find themselves in, so what can be done if you are feeling unhappy? Support is important for foster carers, and here is some advice about how to proceed.
Write it Down
The first place to start is writing down what is making you feel this way. This will be a foundation to move from and give you a narrative to present when the time is right. When you think about what is creating the disconnect in the present moment, you have a set of reasons to work with. It is a great way to organise your thoughts and gives you a sounding board for finding a resolution.
Start the Conversation
There is not a single topic that cannot be discussed with your foster care agency and social worker team. To really get into what is going on, it will all begin with a simple conversation. Initiate the contact and arrange a time with a clear agenda. Talk through your list of concerns and ask questions about how things can move forward in a way that works for everyone.
Give it Time
Nothing is fixed overnight. Though you may be feeling unhappy now, once the conversation has started, there could be better days to come. It is beneficial to wait a few weeks before you make any major decisions. The last thing anyone wants is for you to quit the role entirely!
Research Alternative Options
If your current situation is unsustainable, and you have exhausted all of the avenues, then you may have thought about how to transfer fostering agencies. Doing so would open up your role to a different setup and new faces to support you through the journey. Sometimes, a change of scene and a different team is all you need to move out of a period of unhappiness. These transformations are often highly positive and put you exactly where you want to be. As ever, it is essential that you research the best options for you through the lens of what you are missing currently and what you hope to gain.
You Deserve Support
The role of a foster carer is highly rewarding, yes, but demanding, nevertheless. You deserve authentic support whenever and wherever you need it to be. This is a given, but there are always going to be carers out there who feel their agency isn’t quite meeting the mark. This is okay, and it is important to name it so that things can move forward safely and positively for everyone involved.
Foster carers need a support network around them in order to thrive in the role. Young people who are looked after require a level of care that can only be provided by someone who has a team around them and knows how to protect their own well-being too.