Two chemotherapy treatments in one year: Alina (26) had cancer twice: “After the healing, the fear really starts”
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Alina received two cancer diagnoses at a young age. Although she is now considered cured, the fear remains. How the 26-year-old deals with it and what gave her strength during chemotherapy.
Alina wasn’t able to fully enjoy her 23rd birthday. As in all previous years, there were congratulations, cake and photos with guests. But all without the usual exuberance. The question hanging over everything was: Will the call still come today? When the phone rang at 5 p.m., Alina finally had certainty: she had lymphatic cancer.
But she had already suspected that something was wrong with her body. A few months before, just before Christmas 2020, Alina suddenly had a fever. At night she was so wet with sweat that she had to change clothes several times. But the corona tests were negative, and doctors initially suspected other causes such as rheumatism or Pfeiffer’s glandular fever.
It was only after some time that Alina was examined in the hospital with a computer tomography. The doctors immediately scheduled an operation for the next day. “It was clear to me then that it was more serious. “The doctors’ looks also told me that something was wrong,” she tells FOCUS online.
After the cancer diagnosis, “I just functioned”
It only took a few days until she was diagnosed on her birthday – but they felt like months. “I almost fell over every time the phone rang because I was expecting the crucial call.” Alina reports that her first thought after the phone call with the doctor was very banal: “Oh God, I’m going to lose all my hair .” She didn’t know much about cancer, that was her first association. On the day of the diagnosis, Alina cried – but then she didn’t cry anymore. “Then I just functioned.”
In the weeks that followed, preparations for chemotherapy began: examining lung function, operating a port and removing ovaries to preserve fertility. The chances of recovery for her type of cancer were good, says Alina. “That’s why I was never specifically afraid of dying, even though the disease can of course be fatal. “I was much more afraid of the treatment,” she admits.
She did a quick search online and quickly came across horror stories about chemotherapy. “I quickly clicked that away. After that, I looked more specifically for people who had led relatively normal lives despite the treatment.”
Alina tells her cancer story on Instagram
Alina immediately spoke about her diagnosis with all family members and friends. “I wanted them to find out directly from me and not have any rumors arise.” During the six chemo cycles, which lasted around four months, she was only able to see a few people – her immune system was too weakened. In order to keep her friends up to date, Alina recorded a video for them, which she later posted on Instagram.
At this point, only those close to her were followers. But the more Alina reported about her illness and the chemo, the more young people followed her and told her their own cancer stories. Alina’s reports remained unvarnished: she also reported low points and appeared bald. “I didn’t want to hide and I never felt like I had to hide,” she explains. Today, the 26-year-old has more than 13,000 followers on her Instagram account.
“The encouragement I received helped me a lot.” But the biggest support was her family and friends. “I always knew that I had people who had my back,” says Alina and begins to cry. “I always feel that way when I talk about it. That just means a lot to me.”
The chemotherapy gave me security – then the fear really started
The chemotherapy finally came to an end in July 2021. “I’m damn proud of my body for how it’s handled everything,” she wrote on Instagram. Some time later, Alina was considered cured. “I’ve always been looking forward to this moment. But after healing, the fear really started,” she says. The chemo gave her security in the fight against cancer, which then disappeared.
In the weeks that followed, Alina continued to feel bad. Has the cancer returned? The young woman wanted to remain optimistic and wrote on Instagram: “I’ve noticed over the last few days that I’m great at it, all the symptoms of a recurrence (the return of a tumor, editor’s note) to feel things that are hopefully all just my imagination.” Alina’s followers encouraged her: “I felt the same way! “Your head likes to play tricks on you,” commented one, while another wrote: “You’re done with it.”
But the fever and night sweats just wouldn’t go away. When it was particularly severe, Alina decided to go to the emergency room. But a doctor there rejected her. “My son has also had an infection for a long time,” he downplayed her concerns. This made Alina angry: “It damaged my trust in the doctors.”
Two cancer diagnoses within one year
After numerous changes of doctors, she finally returned to the oncologist who had looked after her at the beginning of her cancer. “I then had a caregiver again who knew my history. I simply couldn’t cope with having to explain my situation to a different doctor every time. That costs an enormous amount of energy.”
The oncologist finally facilitated an examination that led to the second cancer diagnosis within a year. At this point, the tumor was again the same size as before the chemotherapy. The treatment that followed was even more severe for Alina than the first. For example, during a risky operation, a piece of tissue was removed while the patient was conscious. Unlike the first therapy, Alina was also treated with her own stem cells, which caused an unpleasant feeling in her body.
One day late in the evening, Alina received a call from the family doctor, where her blood had been taken the day before. The doctor was alarmed and the blood values were bad. Alina had to go to the hospital. “You then have to get yourself out of bed, and when you get to the hospital you are constantly being woken up for examinations,” she says.
Because of the corona pandemic, no one was allowed to accompany her. Alina became a regular guest in the emergency room. During the second round of chemotherapy, she also had to vomit for the first time due to the treatment and had to be fed artificially for a few days.
“Many doctors don’t like it at all when you ask questions”
When Alina talks about her illness and therapy, she talks about many medical details and uses numerous technical terms. Although she initially didn’t want to find out too much about the topic, over time she became an expert. This also has to do with negative experiences: once she was given too many chemo tablets, and once she got the wrong result. “You have to inform yourself in order to prevent something like this and to be able to ask the doctors the right questions.”
“But many doctors don’t like it at all when you know so much and ask questions. “They then feel their competence is being attacked,” suspects Alina. “But it’s my body and I want to know what’s happening to me. In general, she would like more attention.
But there were also positive experiences: “I always thought it was nice when a doctor pulled up a chair or sat on the edge of the bed. On the one hand, you don’t speak from above, but rather at eye level. And on the other hand, there is the feeling that the doctor is there for you at the moment, even if he is actually stressed and has to move on straight away.”
“I felt like an old woman at 25 years old”
After the second chemotherapy, Alina decided on antibody therapy. This is intended to prevent the disease from returning again. But the side effects were severe: Alina’s nervous system was damaged and after a while she could no longer even walk. “At 25, I felt like an old woman; my 80-year-old grandmother was fitter,” she says. The doctors therefore wanted to end the treatment early – but Alina didn’t. It was only shortly before the regular end of therapy that she was able to bring herself to stop.
That was a little over a year ago now. The 26-year-old’s nerves have regenerated, but Alina is still not as mobile as she was before the therapy. The good news: So far the cancer has not returned. But the fear still resonates. With every physical change, the fear of a relapse arises.
The illness changed her consciousness, says Alina. “Everything makes you ask yourself: Is this beneficial for my health? What ingredients are in my cosmetic products, how healthy is the food? But I can’t stress myself too much, that would also be unhealthy.” She has lost some lightness in her life, but is also very grateful. “And I’m proud of how I overcame everything and grew from the illness.”
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