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Disconnection in families: “Parents feel shame, guilt, loss, humiliation and anger”

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Disconnection in families: “Parents feel shame, guilt, loss, humiliation and anger”

Alienation is more common in families — particularly between parents and adult children — than is commonly thought, says Sarah Schoppe-Sullivan, a professor of psychology at Ohio State University. There are no reliable figures, because the topic is still taboo. But there are first insights into why family members fall apart.

The researcher and her team asked more than 1,000 mothers about the reasons for their alienation from their adult children. Not surprising at first: Almost 80 percent of the mothers state that another family member – usually the biological father, more often the son or daughter-in-law – turned the children against their mothers.

However, the reasons adult children give for distancing themselves from their parents are completely different. On both sides, however, the disappointments and injuries are often so great that hardly any remedy seems to help.

But psychologists and therapists have analyzed which families can grow together again – and which ways are the best.

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