It shapes the entire life: the bond that a person forms with their parents in the first months of life. Is the child learning to have his or her emotional needs met? Are his mother and father sensitive? So does it take basic trust along the way?
Attachment theory is one of the most influential developmental psychology theories of all. She assumes that we internalize the attachment experiences of infancy – and that this shapes how we deal with feelings over the course of our lives. Securely attached people manage to regulate their feelings well in close relationships, insecurely attached people find other ways of dealing with things, some are more avoidant, some cling to their partners. This is not pathological, but it can definitely cause problems in relationships.
But how do you find out how securely you are bound? Should and can you work on your attachment type? Psychology professor and director of the State Institute for Early Childhood Education and Media Literacy, Fabienne Becker-Stoll, provides answers to this in the new episode of “Do you feel the same way?” She says that our early childhood experiences shape our lives, but they are not fate. Of the people who are securely attached as adults, half have had very difficult experiences in childhood. However, these people could later reflect on this and, for example, perceive their parents’ previous constraints.
Becker-Stoll explains that in addition to our own parents, many other people can also play an important role in our attachment patterns: teachers, grandparents, friends, partners and the partner’s family. Her studies give her hope: Today, young people have a completely different approach to their feelings than they did a few decades ago, a completely different vocabulary for their mental life. This can only be good news for attachment patterns.
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In our new live talk format “Do you feel the same way?” Let’s talk about mental health, what the psyche can withstand and what’s good for it. About feelings and experiences that more people share than many people think. We ask psychologists, therapists, doctors and researchers for advice and support. Live on Instagram every month.
It shapes the entire life: the bond that a person forms with their parents in the first months of life. Is the child learning to have his or her emotional needs met? Are his mother and father sensitive? So does it take basic trust along the way?
Attachment theory is one of the most influential developmental psychology theories of all. She assumes that we internalize the attachment experiences of infancy – and that this shapes how we deal with feelings over the course of our lives. Securely attached people manage to regulate their feelings well in close relationships, insecurely attached people find other ways of dealing with things, some are more avoidant, some cling to their partners. This is not pathological, but it can definitely cause problems in relationships.