When I’ve had a stressful day, when I’m mentally and physically destroyed, when I’m out of balance and take a lot of thoughts with me to bed, I hear a deep snore from the bedroom. My dog Spagna is lying across the open bedroom door, her snoring echoing through half the house.
It has increased with age, in August she will be 16 years old, and I was able to go through life with her for 15 and a half of those years. And every day with her was a gift, and still is. That’s why she lies across the door so that she knows when I come into the bedroom to go to bed. I have to climb over her, so she realizes that I’m finally with her. She wouldn’t hear me, her ears are failing massively.
She usually raises her head briefly and lets out a contented sigh: Finally you’re here! Stroke me for a moment and then let’s all go to sleep, she wants to tell me. Then she snores again and that sound gives me peace. And lets me fall asleep. It’s been like this for so many years and there’s nothing I love more than this snoring, it’s the feeling of home and security. When I’m in an extremely stressful phase of my life, I sometimes long for Spagna’s peace all day long.
She still has strength, she’s happy to give it to me
Every day I am incredibly afraid that one day I will have to fall asleep without this snoring, that I won’t be able to stroke Spagna’s soft ears when I wake up because she is no longer with me. Because she’s gone forever. And this despite the fact that there are no signs of it. It’s a fear as deep as our relationship. We have been very, very close since the moment I rescued Spagna from an Italian animal shelter when we first met. Since then we have been connected, deeply connected. She knows how I feel. I know how she feels. All it takes is a quick look into your eyes.
However, I also see that Spagna has gotten old in the last two years. On the outside she is really a grandmother, but she is fit and agile like a young puppy. She doesn’t let me out of her sight for a minute, she senses more than ever that I sometimes have stressful days, that I’ve often been sad in the last few weeks, that I’ve been anything but balanced.
Spagna is there all the time. Unconditionally! She knows for sure, she definitely feels that she no longer has the strength that she had three years ago. And yet: She gives me the strength she has. This humbles me. She just does everything to make me feel better. And she doesn’t give up until I finally laugh again. And it looks like she really enjoys doing it. Yes, that’s you, wonderful Spagna.
Without Spagna I would only be half as healthy
It’s not new that dogs have a positive effect on our psyche. It may be old hat that dogs are even used as therapy. Our heart rate drops when we pet a dog. Not a new insight either. But what I’ve only known since I’ve shared my life with Spagna is that you can learn unconditional love through dogs. A form of love that cannot be surpassed in terms of purity. Likewise, my old girl is loyal and, above all, pure!
She shows me all of this and much more every day. She doesn’t want to prove anything to me, she doesn’t do things out of calculation, she’s just there. And I’m two or three times as happy as before when I’m back home after two days. And I’m sure she just wants to give it her all because she knows she doesn’t have much time left.
Without this dog, my mental health would have been bad for 16 years. So I owe everything to Spagna. She has kept me mentally healthy for so many years.
I wish every person a spagna.