The undeniable benefits of social media
My dog was bitten. In the nose. About a big bulldog that came out of nowhere, was off leash, and immediately went on the attack. I don’t know this dog and neither does the owner. Lots of fuss and shouting, but luckily nothing was permanently broken apart from my faith in the world. The incident happened in my village, right next to the school, where I pass almost every day. I only move very carefully through the streets.
As always, I’m looking for help on the internet. I try typing “pitbull (village name)” into Facebook and pictures of that dog immediately appear. You can see him walking around without a leash in my village, in the neighboring village too. The owner’s profile is completely public, and offers me a whole range of interesting insights into his existence. I now know the dog’s name, the dog’s weight, the owner’s past, his various criminal records, what he likes to eat, learn new slang terms I didn’t know, and what times he’s out like this is. I also find out that he is moving into a new apartment.
A few days after the incident described above, he posts a picture of the view from his new apartment. In this picture is also the exact address, maybe it happened by mistake, automatically. That same evening I find out that the man is at home with his dog. A home ten miles away from me. My village has become predictable again.
(Alan Smithee)