The emotional meanings, the consequences, how a parent should behave when a boy decides to get hurt. In summer you can notice the discomfort: you can see, for example, the marks on the exposed skin
Self-harm is a more widespread practice than one might think, especially among adolescents. From a 2019 analysis it is estimated that the prevalence in Europe affects 18.4% of boys, but the official data is old and collected before the pandemic, after which the phenomenon expanded.
Self-injurious behavior involves hurting oneself in various ways (especially by cutting) to relieve pain, but without the intention of taking one’s own life. They are all those behaviors aimed at causing physical harm, tendentially aimed at conduct that does not endanger life, specifies Giancarlo Cerveri, director of the complex operating unit of Psychiatry, ASST of Lodi and adds: The theme of cutting (cutting oneself, ed) is very specific, because it above all concerns a specific population, adolescents. In adolescence the body becomes central to the changes that take place and becomes the place where all the critical issues fall.
We know that the percentage of young people with psychiatric illnesses has doubled after the pandemic: before Covid, 13% of adolescents, especially girls, experienced at least one episode of depression during their adolescence. In the pandemic, the percentage doubled and reached 25%.
Some anxious or depressed teens engage in physical pain to lessen the mental pain. Why, what drives them?
At the base there is a reaction of impulsivity – explains Cerveri -: in adolescence there is not yet a complete development of the areas of control of impulsivity and the result is the tendency to act in a “strong” way. This behavior, in the face of frustration and anger, tends to turn into aggression, which in some cases becomes self-inflicted aggression. After this outburst of anger leading to injury, a substantial reduction in anxiety occurs, a sort of emotional regulation. a growing phenomenon also because in recent years the body has become an instrument of communication (think of tattoos, piercings). A role also played by loneliness: the boys are continuously connected to each other, but in reality they are alone: cutting represents an attempt to experience pain in a solitary way.
Which young people are at risk of self-harm?
They are more female than male and tend to be lonely people, sometimes characterized by shyness, sometimes victims of some form of bullying. Uncertainty about gender identity and sexual orientation are also issues that can trigger pain and anxiety and consequently, self-harm.
How does the teenager experience this gesture?
There are two distinct behaviors; the first is the most widespread, of shame: the cuts are hidden (which are usually on the arms, on the stomach, on the covered parts of the thighs), in some, however, the need to show one’s body prevails, even when suffering.
What are the consequences of these behaviors?
Basically, if the psychopathological picture does not worsen, cutting oneself does not lead to suicide attempts, but in some cases the situation worsens and real depressive pictures can be reached.
Can those who cut themselves push their friends to do it?
No: the protagonist feels a sense of shame, often they are not people capable of motivating others, they are generally suffering individuals. On the contrary there may be a mechanism of emulation in friends: “I too want to experience this physical system of pain that extinguishes anger or anxiety” that cannot be controlled.
What are the alarm bells for parents?
If you observe “suspicious” scars, be careful to believe the dissimulation, when it is said “I was the cat”, “I fell”: you have to wait for the boy to want to talk about it, but certainly in the summer the signs can be seen on the bare skin, or there is a reluctance to undress (and put on short clothes) which must make you think.
What can parents say to the boy/girl?
First of all, it is necessary not to get scared and not to pretend nothing happened. It is necessary to give support to the young people by helping them to formulate a request for help, which perhaps includes the use of a psychologist or a psychiatrist. Listen to the kids to understand how these behaviors came about, at the same time trying not to trivialize, not belittle but rather listen and offer help.
And in terms of prevention? right to discuss the topic with teenagers? Show films on the subject?
We are often afraid that someone might find the stories of self-harm fascinating, but the narration of these aspects is something that describes reality and allows us to have a more open and free vision. Information is given, well, and an attempt is made to help people so that certain behaviors no longer occur. The representation allows the adolescent to recognize himself in his own suffering and perhaps to look for alternative ways.
Outside the family, who should parents turn to? Even the teachers?
The most appropriate thing is always to look for specific skills, psychologists or psychiatrists. Privacy at school should be maintained, because feelings of shame could change and encourage the boy’s removal from school. In any case, the experts can help families and young people to manage the communication steps as well.
July 20, 2023 (change July 20, 2023 | 4:32 pm)
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