- Jason Armesto
- BBC correspondent in Washington
image source,Getty Images
“Fortunately we voted for the same party”
Angela Hammontree, 55, considers herself very conservative — “pro-gun ownership, pro-Biblical tradition, pro-Trump.”
However, when it comes to falling in love, these may become her stumbling blocks.
“The first guy I dated after my divorce looked like a good guy,” recalls Hammondi, “and then I found out, he’s a damn Democrat!”
They dated for three months but split a month before the November 2020 presidential election.
“I can’t take it anymore,” she said. “I really like this guy, but I think it’s hard to go very far in a relationship with different (political) perspectives.”
Now, she’s going to Google her voter registration file before a date — just to make sure she’s not eating with a Democrat.
In fact, research shows that Hammondry’s view of love is not unique to her. A 2020 poll by internet research firm YouGov and The Economist found that 86 percent of Americans believe it has become more difficult to date someone who supports an opposing party.
Experts say that who you vote for has become one of the most important things in love.
image source,John McEntee
McEntire, left, is the co-founder of The Right Stuff, a Republican-only dating app.
The challenges are especially acute for singles who are a political minority in their place of residence, and span different generations.
For example, young people who have worked for the White House during Trump’s tenure have been known to find it difficult to fall in love in a liberal-dominated Washington.
Daniel Huff, Trump’s former White House adviser, once went on a date and ordered a cocktail before being thrown by someone before it was served. In that short window of time, Huff’s date knew where he was working. She walked away quickly.
That experience inspired him to work with fellow former Trump employee John McEntee earlier this month to develop “The Right Stuff,” a dating app that only allows conservatives to join .
“Conservatives in liberal territory are totally discriminated against,” McEntire complained. “They’re forced to feel alone and totally alienated.”
Users must disclose general information such as height and gender when registering. However, when adding some personal information to their profile, they can choose from a few prompts, such as: “Just tell me a fact about why I love America”; “(My) favorite Democratic lie”; “My favorite conservative Send Commentator” and “January 6th is…”
Users must be invited to join. In theory, this would keep liberals out of the app, preventing them from affecting the experience of serious users.
image source,Nora Murphy
As a liberal living in a conservative state, Nora Murphy has a hard time finding a partner who aligns with her political values
Liberal women in the country’s conservative turf have similarly found dating difficult.
Nora Murphy, 32, has spent years exploring dating experiences in crimson Idaho. While acknowledging that he was a political minority there, Murphy also wanted to give conservative men there a chance.
“We’d get along just fine, and then when it came to politics, it was clear that a relationship wasn’t going to work,” she said.
Eventually, she married a Romanian.
This disagreement in dating is just one symptom of a deeply divided America. According to the Pew Research Center, “Democrats and Republicans are more ideologically different today than at any time in the past 50 years.”
Last month, a CBS poll found that many Democrats and Republicans see their opponents not as political opponents, but as “enemies.”
Hammondry, who lives in Canton, Ohio, admits that her views on politics and dating are relatively recent developments. Although a lifelong Republican supporter, she doesn’t remember being so concerned about it when she was younger.
“I don’t think I would have thought so strongly at the time that it was a game-changer,” she said.
image source,Angela Hammontree
Angela Hammondry thought she’d found the right mate until she found out he was a Democrat
The researchers believe that as more single people become partners with people who share political views, the same political views will be passed on to their children. “This has the potential to expand polarities by creating homogenized social networks and families,” the 2017 study said.
Rose McDermott, a political psychologist at Cornell University, argues that it has indeed become more apparent in recent years that liberals and conservatives live in groups with their respective political camps.
Dr. McDermott said a deeply divided contemporary American narrative has authenticity, both in relation to love and in the wider social realm.
“I don’t think it’s exaggerating,” she said. “I think it’s getting worse.”